How annoying!

A new survey by Sweatband.com has found that diet and exercise boasters are the most annoying thing about social media. We all have our pet hates about social media updates – here are just a few below!

Diet and exercise posters

We all know the type, it’s the ones who tell us how far they’ve run, how many gallons of green tea they’ve drunk and generally how skinny they’re getting that we all find most nauseating. Perhaps, we find those people who post the good as well as the bad less so because they are more “real”.

People who share pictures of every meal

All those face bookers out there who feel the need to bore us all about every single morsel that they consume.. It’s bad enough those people who tell us about every mouthful, worse still are the cringe worthy photographs that they insist on posting for all to see! Please get a life!

Cryptic status writers

Yes, yes, it’s the cliff hanger posters that we love to hate; you know the ones – they post cryptic sentences which only apply to certain followers.

For example, there’s the mysterious “I can’t believe that just happened…” then there are the others which can be labelled at best slightly menacing and at worst passive aggressive – “don’t you just hate it when people promise to do something then don’t turn up” It’s obvious they’re being catty but just don’t have the to confront the target of their messages.

Instead they see fit to pique our interest just enough to make us hate them for doing just that. In fact, we are more annoyed that we actually care, and are annoyed at the arrogance of our tormentors for thinking that we care!

Game inviters

You know who you are…you’re the ones who bombard us with demands to play virtual farming games or digital racing games or whatever game you seem to have countless time to play on Facebook at the moment. Please..stop with the game requests – I’m not interested, I don’t have time, and if you don’t I will find you and I will BLOCK you!!

Proud parents

OK…so you’re a parent and of course you love your little munchkin and think they’re special and amazing and clever and, and, and! But really spare a thought for those of us who are not interested in every sniffle, step, or sneeze that your little one blesses you with and stop being so family centric!!

People who share very personal details

Please please – it’s just too much information! We don’t want to know what kind of scar you have where and why. Really – spare us the details. If we want to watch embarrassing bodies we’ll turn it on ourselves but being subjected to unsolicited intimate details of your own embarrassments is private – you don’t have  to tell your select group of “Facebook Frenemies”, save it for people who care and the poor medics who’ who’ve had the misfortune to have to treat you!

Those who check in everywhere!

Oh, you’re in your shower? Wonderful – well while you’re in there take your laptop, mobile and other Wi-Fi device in with you and give them a good scrub also! Otherwise I will find you and I will block you again!

Event spammers

While it’s wonderful that you’re hosting a pentathlon to save endangered fleas, we probably don’t really need to hear about it, but we know we’re going to because we know and you know that you care more about the glory than you do the cause. If you were really concerned about endangered anything you wouldn’t go glory hunting.

Constant engagers who like and comment                           

Creepers who stealthily creep through Facebook posts for things to like or comment on, but never generate their own news or content. Liking someone’s post is supportive, but if it’s done too much can be a bit like stalking.

Happy/soulful/inspirational thought posters

Yes we know deep down, you’re struggling with the human condition and the unhappiness that that brings but please; we don’t need to see the crutches that you use in order to offer you support. We don’t even really know you so why would we want to see your cute inspirational quotes that we know are saving you from jumping into your giant vat of self-pity and wallowing in it. Truthfully, and you may find this hard to swallow, but we don’t actually care and if you do it again we will find you, we will block you!

Self-promoters

Yes, of course we want your business to succeed, just as much as we would like you to stop talking about it, so if we like your posts please, don’t post anymore, otherwise we will find you and we will block you!! And then..you’ll have NO friends! How scary would that be?!